so you know when you meet a girl and you fall in love with her and you say “oh man i thought i was in love before this but i was wrong” because merely talking to her makes you feel more alive than ever and wakes up parts of you that you thought were dead and then you tell her you love her and then she says “sorry i already love this one guy who’s a shitfucker” and you get all sad but then you decide to be happy for her because at least shitfucker makes her happy but then it starts to sink in that you can’t EVER be with her and that starts eating at you and you hate the shitcuker and then your ego starts seeing this as a judgement on you personally, and you say “i’ll fucking prove i’m better than that guy” but every possible scenario ends up with you as the loser and your entire life and behaviour starts to slip because it’s obsessing you and then you lose control of your life because you keep retreating further away from reality until there’s nothing left but that girl and you still don’t have her and your friendship with her starts to go and she keeps falling more and more in love with that fucker and you start losing all substance so you can’t think of anything to tell her anymore and you stop showering and you feel a bitter loneliness and desperation and you’re scared that someone’s going to die if this keeps up
Well, it’s not the exacly the easiest thing to do but maybe the best thing to do would be to move on with your life since you say she’s told you she loves someone else and start going out with friends or something to help you stop thinking about her all the time.
I mean you may think she’s the perfect girl for you but its a big world out there and I’m sure they are plenty of other nice girls out that you have similar interests to, although you may not know any others right now, love seems to creep up you when you least expect it.
Anyways I’m no expert in love but I’ve had my heart broken too by someone I really loved () and it gets better, but it takes time.
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Take the Dargon’s advice, for I have none myself. However, I often turn to art and entertainment WHEN I HAVE PAIN IN MY BLACK BLACK HEART. But that’s a double-edged sword piece of advice because then you become a geek.